Who is the Macalope? Part man, part Mac, part… antelope. A sage Mac commentator who does not hesitate to take on critics for vapid commentary while also holding the feet of the Cupertino Gang to the fire when warranted. The Macalope was gracious enough to grant me an interview while moving his things out of CNET. What’s next for the horny one? Hard to say, but we’ll find out once the CNET cash runs out. In the meantime once he cleans up his old stomping grounds at http://www.macalope.com, you will find him posting again.
Q: Thanks for taking time to answer a few questions. I would like to especially thank you for the Palmolive allusion in a post last month. I had to quickly find a Lifehacker post on monitor cleaning after reading the post title. Have to love the interpipes.
The Macalope has a blanket disclaimer that he is not responsible for spit takes. Please read with caution. And a towel.
Q: One million iPhones and approximately 10 million apps sold the first weekend, the best quarter in company history and the herd (not yours I gather) is asking about Jobs’ health? Have you gored anyone over this?
For the most part the horny one has tried to stay away from the issue of Jobs’ health other than to agree with Michael Gartenberg that it’s no one’s business except his. Some have commented that Jobs should get it straight with the board and the board should issue a statement that they’re satisfied. That’s nice. It will also solve exactly nothing for the squeakiest wheels on this issue, most of whom are not even Apple shareholders and yet won’t be satisfied until they have biopsy results and a free iPod touch.
The old saying goes that the graveyards are full of people who couldn’t be replaced. What Apple owes its shareholders is the confidence that they have a solid succession plan. After all, Jobs’ could be in the best of health and still roll his Mercedes one day. Companies are supposed to plan for these things. But no one has the right to anyone else’s personal medical information.
Q: I cannot give Apple a pass for the MobileMe mess. The only thing Apple didn’t do that weekend was release Snow Leopard. How could Sauron.. I mean Steve… not see this coming? Hubris?
Mmm, not hubris, but pushing too hard (if you’ll pardon the MobileMe/push pun). The 3G iPhone could and really probably should have been rolled out without MobileMe. Forcing users to wait a few weeks is better than making users suffer a few weeks. Slow down, Apple. Where’s the fire?
Q: After reading some of your posts such as “Butterflies are free, so why aren’t iPhone apps?” one has to wonder if you have these people on the payroll. You can tell me. Be honest now.
Those are annual reviews the Macalope would love to conduct. “Todd, in looking over your performance over the past year it seems clear that, well, you suck at your job.” No, if the Macalope had these people on the payroll, they’d all be reassigned to the mail room. Or the boiler room. Or the place they rinse out the sweaty gym socks.
Q: Is it just me or is the red-headed stepchild Apple TV a gaming console lying in wait? Allow app store access and it is a complete media center. I imagine that the situation is like that of handheld game makers looking at the iPhone (and Touch). They must be thinking “Game over.” It seems that Apple made a very cool device and just cannot figure out how to market it.
It seems like a logical next step. The issue is probably mostly one of bandwidth. Apple is physically growing slower than its market presence is. They’re having a hard enough time keeping up with what they’re doing, so while an App Store for the Apple TV seems like a natural, they may just not have the
resources to get it off the ground right now.
Q: Has Breen cut you in for half of the t-shit and hoodie sales of “The Bouffant of Knowledge” merchandising?
The Macalope has seen those and they’re actually being sold by someone else. Neither the esteemed Mr. Breen nor the brown and furry one see a dime of that. Which, no offense to Chris, is probably about what the guy’s made off of them. Who wears that?
Q; Jerry Seinfeld for Microsoft commercials? I guess this means Maury Amsterdam is dead.
The brown and furry one at first did not remember who Maury Amsterdam was
and thought maybe that was a pseudonym for Jerry Seinfeld’s career.
The second ad is mildly amusing and the Macalope appreciates Gates’ willingness to make an ass out of himself. But it’s rather questionable as to where this is going. This is an image ad and is the problem with
Vista one of image, or one of the difficult implementation choices it forces Microsoft’s customers to make? Also, this might work with consumers, but a lot of Microsoft’s problem is getting corporations to
migrate from XP to Vista. Read a newspaper, Microsoft. This isn’t a great time to have to do a big, expensive conversion.
Q: I recently read that you and CNET have parted ways. Tell us where fans can find their seer of all things Mac for the foreseeable future. New digs coming?
Yes, CNET has gone through a lot of changes and the inevitable was finally evitable. It was a good experience (read: they sent checks every month) but kind of an odd fit.
The Macalope is back at his old digs for now (www.macalope.com) and, who knows, you may see him pop up somewhere else in the future. Nothing to announce yet, but he’s got a furry ear to the ground.
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Follow the antlered blogger’s commentary issued from his place at http://www.macalope.com; or follow his tweets via Twitter by following TheMacalope. Please no email from fans of Mr. Amsterdam. Maury was funny.
